Using ethics from utilitarianism, shame-culture, and the Church of Asphalt Day Saints, this paper designs a moral compass for AVs
Category Archives: Articles
Proof of Wankery: A Novel Consensus Model for the Blockchain
Proof of Work is killing the planet, Proof of Stake is a pyramid scheme, and other proposed consensus models are either easy to spoof or infeasible to implement. Herein, a new model is proposed: Proof of Wankery (PoWank).
8 Mind Blowing James Webb Telescope Images Tragically Ruined by Someone’s Finger in Front of the Mirror
No one quite knows how the fingers got there, but even the JWST isn’t immune to having its pictures ruined by a misplaced thumb
Funky Linear Operators: A Pre-Conference Fever Dream
I perform markedly sloppy functional analysis shortly before taking an ‘extended sab- batical’.
Everything you need to know about NASA’s DART game
In this decades long game of DARTS, NASA makes the first shot tonight at the DART board drawn on the far off asteroid of Dimorphos
Proto-Platypus Species Generative Modeling: Search for the Ancestors of Nature’s Most Diverse Creature
Using misunderstood AI tools, this paper generates evolutionary models of a proto-platypus species. Conclusion: God made the Platypus.
Local Man Drinks Too Much: Makes Brownian Motion in Parking Lot
According to the bouncer and an Uber Driver, a local drunk man stumbled around in a true brownian motion to his Uber Ride
A Comprehensive Treatise on the Applications of de Broglie Wavelengths for Macroscopic Objects
This this revolutionary study, three friends determine how difficult it would be to diffract their friend Raina in a double slit experiment
The Pirate Kitty Theory: How a House Cat Being let out led to the Extinction of the Dodo Bird
New evidence and a recently found pirate journal has discovered the culprit behind the Dodo’s extinction, a cat named Lord Whiskers
Flavortown in the Brain: Localizing generators of hedonic food response in the forebrains of foodies
In this Landmark Study; fMRI results, bland oatmeal, and a cheese burger has successfully located the flavortown center of the brain