Using Future Derivative Vectors an ML algorithm is trained to predict your future based on your palm lines
Tag Archives: Science
Me and My Best Friend Aaron Prove the 3n+1 Problem even though it is a REALLY Hard Problem
In this landmark mathematical proof, two 2nd graders Jack and Aaron create a proof of the Collatz Conjecture
EluciDATE: Matchmaking for Scientists
We report the development of a dedicated networking platform to facilitate professional and romantic matchmaking for scientists.
On The Tardiness Of Coworkers And How To Exploit It
In this groundbreaking research, we determine the optimum amount of time to show up late to a meeting by arbitrarily assigning numbers to things
A Quantitative (N=4) Study of Postpubescent Male Cognitive Activity in Heterosexual Modern Dating
In this landmark study, Scientist Ramisa Fariha studies the existence of brain activity in four boys when interacting with girls
No more flux to give: six things to do with a decommissioned NMR
How to repurpose an old instrument.
Optical Turbulence Characterization and Wiener Filtering of Hot New Intern Induced Temperature Gradients
The new Intern Todd is too HAWT and is screwing up my LIDAR data because of his insane HOTness, we fixed that with a Wiener Filter!
A Particle Physics Model of Why My Room is Never Clean and Why I Shouldn’t have to Clean it Up Everyday Like Mommy Tells Me To
Hello I am Jack Lee and I am in the 2nd Grade. I hate cleaning my room and think it’s particle physics fault and not mine! I like Legos.
Freudian Psychoanalysis of my Boyfriend’s Gun Collection
Using archaic Freudian Psychoanalysis, Tiffany analyzes her boyfriend Chad to determine why he keeps buying guns
8 Sexually Graphic Violin Plots banned in Texan Textbooks and Journals for being too Suggestive
These violin plots look a little too like a certain body part for Texans to be comfortable showing them to their kids