Galactic Federation Behind the 2008 Financial Crisis

You know it’s the 2020 finale when the world finds out that the US government has been hiding extra terrestrial members of the Galactic Federation in an underground bunker on mars. What a way to end a block buster year. With the sudden appearances of the monoliths, which actually turned out to just be poop,Continue reading “Galactic Federation Behind the 2008 Financial Crisis”

Clash at Machine Learning Conference Leaves Dozens Wounded

Late last night at a machine learning conference in Chicago IL, a civilized argument grew into a violent riot over two software libraries. Due to inexperienced organizers scheduling lectures and round panels, the TensorFlow and Scikit-learn library development panels were not only scheduled at the same time but in adjacent lecture rooms. According to surveysContinue reading “Clash at Machine Learning Conference Leaves Dozens Wounded”

Tracking International Terrorism with Mycorrhizal Networks

Common Mycorrhizal Networks are being used to spread radical religious ideology. This paper shows how we tracked it and decoded the tree language.

Novel Techniques for Hijacking Self-Driving Cars

This paper outlines methods to hijack and trap self driving cars by exploiting their safety sensors and Cheetah brain algorithm.

Dietetic Benefits of Simple Carbohydrates and Bovine Byproduct in Low Earth Orbit

The matter of this thesis is explained simply as; we made spacey food, overfed astronauts with said food, then ruthlessly judged their physical and mental performance with nebulus exercises and fun brightly colored puzzles.