Maggie Reid1, and Dr. Gregor MacGregor2
1 Department of Interracial Computer Science, Cramberry-Lemon University, Pittsburgh, PA, USA
2 Department of Linguistics, William Wallace University, Edinburgh, Scotland
Abstract
Translating the prolific and infamously forgotten traditional New Years song Auld Lang Syne has been the white whale of linguistics. Originally a folk song mumbled at bars by Scotsmen at the beginning of a new year, it is now a widely known standard mumbled at bars by the entire English-speaking world. Unfortunately, Scottish has been a long-lost language whose meaning has remained a mystery for centuries. Thanks to the discovery of the Blimey stone, we now have an artifact finally linking old Scottish, Welsh, and English together. This artifact may be the key to finally decoding the true meaning of Auld Lang Syne, in this paper we will utilize the Blimey stone as a key to finally understand the song. We couldn’t do it.
Keywords: Scottish Language, Blimey Stone, Archeology, New Years, Auld Lang Syne, Linguistics
1. Introduction
Found just north of Perth at the bottom of a bog while searching for lost car keys after a rough night, the Blimey stone was lying in wait. Following the end of the first war of Scottish Independence, Edward the III wrote a royal decree he wanted to be understood in all languages North and South of the English-Scotland Border, which he did not think existed. As shown in Figure 1, this decree was imprinted on a large stone which was so large that ‘Neyther maye anye charlatannes caste nor remooveth it’. It turns out it wasn’t that big because they were all tossed into bogs.
This decree is the only document known to contain the Scottish Language alongside English, Welsh, or any known language. Despite our previous attempts to translate modern Scottish using Machine Learning, it has been understood to be a futile effort concluding that not only can machines not interface with Scotts but that there is no True Scottish language, modern or ancient [1].
2. Methodology
We know that the Blimey Stone was created sometime in the 14th century and that Auld Lang Syne was written sometime before it was documented by Robert Burns in 1788. By mapping vocabulary between the three languages, more text may be contextualized previously thought indecipherable. Next, semantic triangulation was used to establish phrases between the three languages. Finally, grammatical syntactics was used to determine the correct order of speech between the languages.
3. Results
After cross referencing the available vocabulary observed from the Blimey stone, we still have no idea what Auld Lang Syne means. Even between all of the new available vocabulary now discovered through the Blimey stone we have been unable to match any new knowledge to modern day Scottish or whichever version of Scottish was used to write that song. When we attempted to corroborate some of the language with some of the locals who threw my keys in the bog we were told ‘Ach, laddie, ye shoulda left tha’ stane weel enou’ alane in the bog! It’s nae a thing tae be meddlin’ wi’, mark ma words!’ We tried to cross reference this speech with the Blimey stone and we still don’t know what they were talking about.
4. Discussion
There are multiple explanations for why the Blimey Stone may have been insufficient in translating Auld Lang Syne. Primarily, we do not know when the song was written, and the language may have changed significantly since the Blimey stone was created. Alternatively, the Blimey stone may have been written well after the creation of the famous folk song. If the language transforms as rapidly as the English language has since the Blimey stone, there may be more work required to decode this ancient yet modern language.
An alternative theory suggests that Edward III and his translators also didn’t understand how to speak to Scots. Considering how violent the first war for Scottish Independence was, perhaps the English and Scots did not understand each other whatsoever. Considering how the English still do not understand the Scottish language or people, it is not out of the question that they did not in the 14th century as well. Further translations utilizing the Blimey Stone may now be uncertain.
Perhaps this could be an important puzzle piece to decipher this long-lost modern language. Given the uncertainty of the accuracy of the Blimey Stone accuracy in the 14th century and the uncertainty of the Blimey Stone’s relevance to the modern-day Scottish language, the discovery must be further contextualized with other Scottish texts.
5. Conclusion
Perhaps we will never know the true meaning of Auld Lang Syne. Whether or not the folk song is ever deciphered we will likely be doomed to always look up the lyrics every year five minutes before the stroke of Midnight on New Years Eve so that we can sing along. The fact that the song is so long lasting may be the larger mystery. All we know is that Shid ald akwentans bee firgot, an nivir brocht ti mynd? Shid ald akwentans bee firgot, an ald lang syn? Or whatever that means.
References
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