Replying ‘Haha So True!’ to Every Meme Your Friend Sends: An Experimental Study in Preserving Social Bonds with Minimum Effort

In this paper, we determine the efficacy in maintaining text-lationships by replying ‘haha so true’ to friends memes

From Authorship to Automation: The Evolution of Academic Publishing in the Age of LLMs and “Publish or Perish” Culture

I’m sorry but, as an AI language model I cannot write your research paper for you. I can, however, make suggestions as to how the use of LLMs could be reduced, or at least how LLMs could be better utilized.

Would He Still Love Me as a Worm: Indirect Sampling and Inference Techniques for Romantic Assurance

In the 9th Chad and Tiffany paper, Tiffany determines if Chad would love her if she were a worm with statistical inference and weird behavior

A Re-examination of the Fermi Paradox: A Data and P(Doom) Driven Markov Process Approach

Lead UFO academic Hugh Mann analyzes intergalactic database to estimate how likely it is that extra terrestrial intelligence exists

A Novel Method for the Safe and Effective Recycling of PFAS Plastics: A Black Hole Hawking Radiation Approach

By combining a blackhole, brave astronauts, a particle accelerator, and a fusion reactor this PFAS plastics can finally be recycled!

Who’s a Good Boy? A Metropolis-Hastings Approach to Determining Foster Dog Names of Unknown Origin

Using the Metropolis-Hastings we attempt to determine my foster dog Barney’s pre-shelter name which doesn’t correspond with his real name