A Link between Ska-Music and Cognitive abilities in Chimps?

“According to decades of my previous research, there are fascinating applications of Ska music in the physical, emotional, and social development of chimpanzees. We’re studying whether or not the two-tone beats of second and third wave ska music can improve cognitive abilities in primates. Right now, particularly in Chimpanzees” Dr. Smyth explained.

“According to initial laboratory experiments, we were able to double the intelligence of a chimp by playing ‘Super Rad’ by the Aquabats while one chimpanzee took a cognitive assessment test involving some blocks and some holes. If our modeling and simulation work is correct, we think this will be the same for all Chimpanzees!”

Okay, I guess I’ll start analyzing your Chimpanzee-Ska Data

Why Ska music? I don’t even know what that is? It’s like white people reggae?

This seems like a stupid thing to research. Aren’t there better questions to answer in science?

Published by B McGraw

B McGraw has lived a long and successful professional life as a software developer and researcher. After completing his BS in spaghetti coding at the department of the dark arts at Cranberry Lemon in 2005 he wasted no time in getting a masters in debugging by print statement in 2008 and obtaining his PhD with research in screwing up repos on Github in 2014. That's when he could finally get paid. In 2018 B McGraw finally made the big step of defaulting on his student loans and began advancing his career by adding his name on other people's research papers after finding one grammatical mistake in the Peer Review process.

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