You look into the ancient code.

You ignore Big Balls advice and start poking into the code. COBOL forces all lines of the code to be maximum 128 characters so sometimes there are some very strange variable names just to fit on the line. These were extremely strange, and you weren’t entirely sure what they represented at all.

IDENTIFICATION DIVISION.
PROGRAM-ID. NEB-KHET.

DATA DIVISION.
WORKING-STORAGE SECTION.
01 DJED-MAA PIC 9(5)V99 VALUE 0. *> Djed-Maa
01 NEFER-KA PIC 9(3)V99 VALUE 0. *> Nefer-Ka
01 REN-PERET PIC 9(5)V99 VALUE 0. *> Ren-Peret
01 HENNU PIC X(30) VALUE 'Hennu…'.
01 TCHAT-NETER PIC X(30) VALUE 'Tchat-Neter: '.

PROCEDURE DIVISION.
MAIN-PROCESS.
DISPLAY HENNU.
DISPLAY 'Djed-Maa: ' WITH NO ADVANCING.
ACCEPT DJED-MAA.
DISPLAY 'Nefer-Ka: ' WITH NO ADVANCING.
ACCEPT NEFER-KA.COMPUTE REN-PERET = DJED-MAA * NEFER-KA.

DISPLAY TCHAT-NETER REN-PERET.
DISPLAY 'Heh.'.
STOP RUN.

Upon reading the code you get increasingly spooked out what do you do?

Move on, this is way too creepy and there’s no way there’s fraud in this code.

Read the code out loud. Maybe the variables will make sense if you do that.

Published by B McGraw

B McGraw has lived a long and successful professional life as a software developer and researcher. After completing his BS in spaghetti coding at the department of the dark arts at Cranberry Lemon in 2005 he wasted no time in getting a masters in debugging by print statement in 2008 and obtaining his PhD with research in screwing up repos on Github in 2014. That's when he could finally get paid. In 2018 B McGraw finally made the big step of defaulting on his student loans and began advancing his career by adding his name on other people's research papers after finding one grammatical mistake in the Peer Review process.

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