Have you heard of the story of Darth Python the Wise?

photo of men having conversation

I thought not, it is not a story a comp sci professor would tell. It’s a programmer legend. Darth python was a Dark software developer of the FORTRAN age, so powerful and so wise he could use VSCode to influence the build environment tests to create code from thought… He had such a knowledge of python and his code base that he could even keep the libraries he cared about from becoming deprecated.”

“He could actually update old buggy libraries?” you ask.

“The dark side of software development is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural.”

“What happened to him”

“He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was giving away his repo admin rights…which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice removed his access during a summer vacation. Ironic. He could save others from becoming deprecated, but not himself.”

“Is it possible to learn this power?” you ask

“Not from freecodecamp.org

Long story short, you commit a Force Push commit-66 and it was all over. You over threw your companies entire code base with your new master.

Darn, at the end of the day, you just couldn’t debug that code! Once you started to listen to your coworker, he turned you into a dark programmer who hid in the shadows and overthrew your entire software branch in the company to bring forth 100 years of darkness. Better luck next time! Maybe don’t get hung up on hating what the previous coder did.

If you want to redeem yourself, you can try again 🙁

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Published by B McGraw

B McGraw has lived a long and successful professional life as a software developer and researcher. After completing his BS in spaghetti coding at the department of the dark arts at Cranberry Lemon in 2005 he wasted no time in getting a masters in debugging by print statement in 2008 and obtaining his PhD with research in screwing up repos on Github in 2014. That's when he could finally get paid. In 2018 B McGraw finally made the big step of defaulting on his student loans and began advancing his career by adding his name on other people's research papers after finding one grammatical mistake in the Peer Review process.

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