You Report a Suspected Crime

man wearing black officer uniform

“Hello, 911, I’d like to report a crime” you call as you’re driving back to the school.

“What is the nature of the crime?” the voice on the other line replies.

“My college professor is abusing Chimpanzees!”

“Sir or ma’am, do you know the penalty for prank calling this number? Please don’t call back again unless this is an actual emergency.”

They hang up on you. You see a cop on the side of the road leaning against the hood of his car talking to the driver. You slam on your breaks and jog over to them. “Sir I need your help, I think my teacher is abusing animals.”

“Abusing animals? Are you sure?” He asks.

“Yes, I’ve never been more sure in my life!”

The two cops look at each other. “Okay, where?”

You give the cops the address of you ex-professor you found during all of the snooping. He’ll see justice soon. What do you do now?

Let the professionals handle it and go back to your summer job

Follow them to the crime scene, you have to know

Published by B McGraw

B McGraw has lived a long and successful professional life as a software developer and researcher. After completing his BS in spaghetti coding at the department of the dark arts at Cranberry Lemon in 2005 he wasted no time in getting a masters in debugging by print statement in 2008 and obtaining his PhD with research in screwing up repos on Github in 2014. That's when he could finally get paid. In 2018 B McGraw finally made the big step of defaulting on his student loans and began advancing his career by adding his name on other people's research papers after finding one grammatical mistake in the Peer Review process.

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